How To Survive The Holidays With A Newly Broken Heart
Holiday breakups are, unfortunately, very common because of the added toll this time of year takes on relationships. Emotions, needs, and expectations tend to run high during the holiday season with money, parties, families, stress, and more money. It makes it hard on everyone. There are many added stressors that aren’t typically there that can set you both on edge.
It’s also naturally a time of year where people reflect on the past year and look ahead to the next year. It’s a time people are more critical about aspects of their life because they’re looking to make changes moving forward.
Holidays and Breakups, Divorces, and Separations Go Hand in Hand
Breakups are always hard, but the hurt seems to be elevated during the most sentimental time of year. It can leave you feeling isolated, empty, and like you’re just going through the motions.
You were excited about the traditions you’ve created together or about making new ones. And, you were excited to have someone to spend this time of year with, to buy presents for and bring to your office party. But now everything has changed and it feels like it’s changed for the worst.
Breakups and Singleness Can Feel Isolating
It’s easy to feel like you’re the only single person on the planet experiencing this loneliness and holiday blues. There are so many things that point to cozy couples, including your social media channel that it feels like everyone else is happy and filled with holiday cheer, except you. The hurt and the loss can feel so overwhelming and intense at times.
There’s still pressure to go to the holiday parties and follow through on commitments you’d already made. It can feel even harder if anyone asks where your ex is, tries to comfort you, or worse -- wants you to talk about it in front of people. Remember, you can always sneak out without saying goodbye if you need. You should never feel pressured to please other people when you’re uncomfortable or struggling.
When Holidays Come Up, It’s Normal to Wish you Could Disappear and Avoid Everything
All these situations, traditions, emotions make you want nothing more than for this nightmare to be over and for the holidays to end. You’d rather just disappear and avoid everyone and everything, but that’s seemingly impossible. Your first holiday without your ex is going to be the hardest. It’s important to keep some of the old traditions because too much change too fast isn’t a good thing but while you keep some of the old, add in some new ones.
Too much downtime and space to think can be crippling during the holiday season. You start to rewrite all the memories in your head, play out scenarios that never happened, create them to be better than you really know they would be. You have to keep moving forward, despite how hard it seems at the moment.
Here are some things to keep in mind as your mourn the loss of a relationship during the holidays
The people you surround yourself with for the holidays know someone is missing in your life and that you’re upset, and it’s okay to bring them up if you need. Sometimes talking about it when you feel it’s necessary and helpful, instead of acting like you didn’t lose a big part of your life can be helpful.
It’s important to do what is best for you when you’re coming off a breakup during the holidays. You’re the only one who knows what you’re feeling and experiencing. Take all the time you need to heal.
Focus on the new beginnings for the New Year. This is one of the best times to talk to someone to reevaluate your life moving forward by deciding on new goals and focus points. Someone who can help pick you back up and give you a safe place to vent and make you feel supported. Breakups are hard but you shouldn’t have to go through them alone.
It won’t always feel this bad. The hurt will slowly dissolve over time and things will get easier. This is an important time to reflect on what you want and prioritize your relationship with yourself. You’ve got this.
Individual Therapy is a great way to begin healing
Remember if you need further support, then get in touch with an online therapist in California. You may benefit from individual therapy in Orange County, CA, or Long Beach, CA as you cope with depression, anxiety, and life transitions. Or if you’re looking for specific support around relationships, then therapy for breakups and divorce recovery could be a great source of support!
Try Individual Therapy in Orange County, CA, Long Beach, CA, And Los Angeles County, CA Today!
Navigating the holidays newly single is a challenge. Where once you had a partner, now you are on your own. You may have to field off questions from family or deal with the realization that life has changed. If you are anxious, experiencing loneliness, or want to do some personal work, then beginning individual therapy at Healing Generations Counseling in California may help. Here you will work with an understanding therapist who specializes in therapy for life transitions, relationships, family issues, and divorce. To get started, schedule your free consultation, or contact me by following these simple steps to begin counseling:
Meet with me! Connie Hsu, your understanding therapist
Begin healing and moving through this new life transition with hope!
Other Mental Health Services at Healing Generations Counseling
Relationships are challenging. Whether you’re entering a new one, exiting a long-standing one, or struggling in the midst of one, there is a place for you in therapy. If you’re seeking a different service, then know I offer a wide range of serves for you or for families in my in-office and online Long Beach, CA counseling practice.
Other mental health services at Healing Generations Counseling include individual therapy, multicultural counseling/cross-cultural counseling, marriage counseling and couples therapy, family therapy, PTSD treatment and trauma therapy, therapy for teens, and EMDR therapy, therapy for divorce, break-ups, and separation, and support groups for women, support groups for teens.
All sessions are offered via online therapy in California, with limited in-person options. Begin therapy in Long Beach, CA, Orange County, CA, Los Angeles County, CA. I look forward to walking through your family’s life transitions and guiding you through the various stages of change.